the Blacklight Arrow

David Blacker’s Blog

How to Have Sex in a Mini

Well, obviously you have to have yourself a Mini. Next on the list would be willing partner and a dark lane. Yes, in that order.

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March 28, 2008 - Posted by | cars, Women | , ,

44 Comments »

  1. Very useful and amusing, haha.

    Comment by hnsdiv | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  2. this is for the new mini, would never work in an old mini. anyways nice post

    Comment by razor | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  3. My Pacer was nothing like so accommodating.

    Comment by b_ | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  4. Is it me, or was this car built with the purpose of getting it on? It all fits so… perfectly.

    Comment by invasiveinfection | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  5. Clearly you got the order wrong.

    1. willing partner
    2. dark lane (optional)
    3. own a mini (optional)

    You can borrow a mini or just break into one on a dark lane. I am a little concerned about step 5. If the lane isn’t flat…

    Comment by びっくり | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  6. Very creative…I should get a mini.

    Comment by oftherock | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  7. Not exactly safe hanging around dark lanes. A friend was making out and almost got hijacked, someone pulled a gun on him and tried to steal the pickup he was in (this was at the height of the carjack crisis) so best avoided in SL.

    Comment by Jack Point | March 29, 2008 | Reply

  8. this explains why ZIP Car rents minis by the hour!….
    xoxo

    Comment by suicide_blond | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  9. Funny. I like the crash-test dummies as visuals.

    Comment by Christine | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  10. Got a tutorial for a Ford Aspire? I’m having difficulty. It doesn’t help that the car isn’t sexy.

    Comment by zxvasdf | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  11. [...] if you don’t like that, you can always learn how to have sex in a Mini. Thanks to The Blacklight Arrow for these extremely detailed [...]

    Pingback by 3-29-08 DJ Spooky, Dave Lombardo and Chuck D - The B Side Wins Again « One Neat Thing a Day | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  12. i like step 10

    Comment by hiper84 | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  13. makes sense

    Comment by A.Ho | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  14. razor #2, it may not have worked exactly like that in an old mini but it was certainly possible.

    Comment by sablonneuse | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  15. [...] the most comfortable (1950 Dodge 3/4 ton truck with leather bench seat).  We didn’t have <this handy tutorial>, but we [...]

    Pingback by 6 word Memoir & Sex in a Mini « Sweat Shop Sissy | March 30, 2008 | Reply

  16. Step 11. Call Chiropractor.

    Comment by sorrentolens | March 31, 2008 | Reply

  17. Unfortunately for lots of people, the best dark lanes are the ones we live on…

    Comment by Tanya J. | March 31, 2008 | Reply

  18. Yeah, if you used your own dark lane, your husband might see you from the window…

    Comment by びっくり | March 31, 2008 | Reply

  19. The diagrams are very helpful indeed.

    I should try that sometime..

    But first let me get myself a mini. lol

    Comment by Free Video Templates For Youtube | April 1, 2008 | Reply

  20. If you try that in a dark lane in colombo these days you will be questioned by cops under suspicion :)

    Comment by santhoshi | April 1, 2008 | Reply

  21. David
    Posted this on AutoLanka.com and the guys are having a good laugh there too :) tks for the material :)

    I’m thinking whether MINI Cooper themselves made this stuff out. Guerrilla advertising :)

    Comment by Ranil | April 2, 2008 | Reply

  22. BTW guys if you have a classic mini don’t be too excited as the seat back wont go down! Any ideas :)

    Comment by Sanjay | April 4, 2008 | Reply

  23. [...] that this sex kitten has been practicing…..but…. the whole thing left me remembering THIS…and i definately give extra credit because …well… because the diagrams are kick [...]

    Pingback by Essential Sex Kitten…the driving with no pants edition « Blonder Than You…. | April 5, 2008 | Reply

  24. hehe :D

    Comment by Mr. Ilarijs | April 16, 2008 | Reply

  25. Tried to apply this to a Classic Mini, didn’t work out so well. Finally decide to break in i a huge uggly 4×4 thing that was parked nearby.

    Comment by ydrolina | April 27, 2008 | Reply

  26. check this one :
    http://web.mac.com/bardunen/iWeb/Ydrolina/15.html
    (sex in a classic mini)

    Comment by kerguelen | June 20, 2008 | Reply

  27. ahahah….exactly what’s needed. a blueprint. no more fumbling and sitting on the horn ;)!

    Comment by DeeCee | August 3, 2008 | Reply

  28. [...] Yeah, I knew I could find a link to this most instructional of diagrams for Mini Cooper owners: How to Have Sex in a Mini (I think the diagram was first published in Playboy) Oh, and ladies, I do own a Mini Cooper as [...]

    Pingback by Humping in a small car. - LotusTalk - The Lotus Cars Community | December 7, 2008 | Reply

  29. [...] C’est à Melbourne que le concept renait, revisité par la No Vacancy Gallery, en collaboration avec le Smart Center local.  Le principe du Indoor Drive-In : au sein de la galerie, neuf Smart alignées face à un écran. Projection très privée donc, car limitée à 18 personnes. Début des hostilités le 25 mars avec une filmographie pointue : Faster Pussycat ! Kill ! Kill !, Man on Wire, Not Quite Hollywood… Par contre interdiction de manger dans les voitures et, a fortiori, de concevoir de petits Australiens. Tant pis pour les générations futures, de toute façon, cela ne semble déjà pas évident dans une Mini. [...]

    Pingback by Indoor Drive-In | the Blenheim Gang | February 27, 2009 | Reply

  30. Getting a new 2010 MINI Clubman this weekend, woohoo! More space than my current standard MINI means four people in the car exploring the various footholds than just the displayed 2 dummies. Comes with heated front seats which are ideal in these…ahem…types of activities!

    Comment by Teddy | October 23, 2009 | Reply

  31. Wow.

    Comment by guy | November 7, 2009 | Reply

  32. i like it alot but me and my guy perfer a comfortable bed. well the first place i had it was the bathroom showers at a campground somewhere in Maine. And i am from Massachusetts. i am also lookin for a new boy to make my bed rock

    Comment by sexybabiexoxo | June 19, 2010 | Reply

  33. Sex is my life. I love this method, ive tried many because ive had sex a million times. boys rock my bed at night and i love having it for long hours.go sex and i need a new sex partner:)

    Comment by Sexbythepenis | October 14, 2010 | Reply

  34. [...] How to Have Sex in a Mini March 200833 comments 3 [...]

    Pingback by 2010 in review « the Blacklight Arrow | January 3, 2011 | Reply

  35. man, this shit doesnt look so spacious but well, it can work, i guess

    Comment by meenna | March 19, 2011 | Reply

  36. ha, i like this

    Comment by meenni | March 19, 2011 | Reply

  37. i would hate sex in a moris

    Comment by winnie | March 19, 2011 | Reply

  38. Shouldn’t you also lose a few K’s before trying this?

    Comment by Concerned driver | April 25, 2011 | Reply

  39. [...] [...]

    Pingback by HOW TO: Have sex with your car! - Cobalt SS Network | December 24, 2011 | Reply

  40. Fucking is a good business. Thanks for the tips

    Comment by Moreses | March 18, 2012 | Reply

  41. Not as easy as the instructions. just did it was fun but 4 legs in floor board my calfs where pressed against the glove box the penetration angle is great for the guy so can be done but i think next time ill fold the back seat down with knees in the cargo bay and her feet on the c pillars

    Comment by chris | July 19, 2012 | Reply

  42. Allow feet to gain purchase in cutout in side of central console! ROFL.. this is hilarious. I presume this is tried and tested..

    Comment by Camicazi | November 25, 2012 | Reply

    • Not by me ;)

      Comment by David Blacker | November 26, 2012 | Reply

  43. I have an 03 Mini Cooper and it’s totally possible and I myself have tested it. Simply push both front seats forward to have more couch room in the back seats. Many positions possible with some getting used too. Please show your Mini some love and follow up with a good cleaning the next day. Happy Motorboating 😁

    Comment by MiniMe | January 17, 2014 | Reply


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