the Blacklight Arrow

David Blacker’s Blog

Wimal Weerawansa Ends ‘Fast Unto Death’: “I Might Die,” He Says

National Freedom Front parliamentarian and Mawbimay Pomenarian, Wimal Weerawansa gave up his death fast today after three whole days, citing health reasons. After sipping a glass of thambili, he ordered an ambulance which took him to the Colombo General Hospital Accident Ward, stopping on the way for a Sugar burger at Odel. Minister Weerawansa ordered a ‘chicken sugar daddy’, demanding that they hold the pickles, since they were unpatriotic.

Talking with his mouth full, Weerawansa claimed that he actually wasn’t ending his fast, but merely taking a break as the doctor had ordered. He also said that as the leader (and member) of the National Freedom Front he jolly well had the freedom to fast if he wanted to, and due to health reasons he would be fasting unto death for two days of every week until the UN Secretary General dissolved the advisory panel on Sri Lankan war crimes. However, he also stated that it was his right to fast every other day instead if he got a bit peckish.

All characters in this blog post are fictional, and any resemblance to an actual fast unto death is entirely coincidental.

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July 10, 2010 - Posted by | F&B, government, Politics

8 Comments »

  1. This is priceless comedy! Lol!

    Comment by saffronsays | July 10, 2010 | Reply

  2. Brilliant! What an end to the drama, love the title!

    Comment by magerata | July 11, 2010 | Reply

  3. LMAO! Good times, man.

    Comment by Makuluwo | July 11, 2010 | Reply

  4. Brilliant! He is such a clown I was actually hoping he would keep his word and fast unto death but then a politician who keeps his word is an oxymoron I guess.

    Comment by cj | July 11, 2010 | Reply

  5. I love the Sri Lankan politicians They are “all fart and no shit” The bugger must have got the smell of Karawala badun to break his fast.What a joke

    Comment by Oorumiyya | July 11, 2010 | Reply

  6. Hahahahaha!

    Comment by TW | July 15, 2010 | Reply

  7. […] Lanka, it’s validity, necessity, and legality. These have ranged from newspaper editorials to street farce. Rather than adding my own narrative to this, I thought I’d reproduce some of the […]

    Pingback by The Ban Panel — to Ban or Not? « the Blacklight Arrow | July 23, 2010 | Reply

  8. The great patriot fasts between breakfast and lunch and again from lunch to dinner. EVERY DAY! He has wowed not to end it until either he dies or Ban Ki Moon surrenders unconditionally to Mahinda Rajapakse.

    Comment by dingiri | November 23, 2010 | Reply


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